She's near the end...

Acting fast, I gathered my things and I hopped into the car. I decided to get gas and stop for a snack as I was hungry. When I got back on the road, I felt this intense feeling in my heart. It was pounding hard, I considered pulling over to sit and deep breathe, but in that very moment my sister called. I heard her quiet voice say 'she's gone Deb.' Running down the hall of the hospice I thought: ‘Why am I running, she’s gone”. When I arrived at the room, I saw my sister’s swollen and red eyes. My nephew was standing there, he looked to me as if he was lost, he then hugged me so passionately. As he sobbed it gave me permission to do the same. Our embrace was pure love, for the woman whose body laid there in the bed she occupied for 3 weeks. As I looked over at my mother's body, there was a sense of relief that washed through me, she wasn't in pain anymore, no more suffering. Later I was remembering the events of the day. Why did I stop to get something to eat? Why was I lollygagging? Of course.....everything happens for a reason. My nephew had not seen my mother at all because of the restrictions we all have been experiencing, so she waited for him. She opened her eyes for a moment when she heard his voice. He was able to hold her hand and tell her things he wanted her to know. Then she could leave in peace. Grief is a magical thing....in the sense that it transforms a person and continues to do so until the human can get comfortable living with an open heart. Grief reminds us that we loved so very much, isn’t that what we all want out of life? To love and be loved? From my perspective this is why we are experiencing this physical suit. It challenges us to remember that we are so amazing, that we can love even with the limited perception of the human mind. The more we love and the more we embrace love from the broader perspective, we remember that LOVE is what this life is about. Everything is love. Love, is an infinite intelligence that cannot be described & explained. Grieving shows us the physical body is so important for the physical experience, and we often


ignore it, or we are not fully present with it. So, when we ‘lose’ someone or something that we loved, we realize that we missed so much by worrying, complaining, distracting ourselves and all that is staying in the limited space of the mind instead of the infinite space of the heart. Embracing the gift of grief allows us to remember that emotion is energy. Allowing this energy to move, is healing, heart expanding and teaches us that loving ‘what is’, is expansion. We as a human race are grieving because of the state of upheaval we are in. It’s uncomfortable. We are grieving the way our life was before, and we are realizing we didn’t appreciate what we had. Our eyes have been opened to the chaos that this world is in, but for the most part we were oblivious to it. All of this is waking us up! We see the illusion we once lived in and not just what is going on in the outer physical world, but also within. Were we truly living our highest self? Do we take responsibility for the state of the world, because of the choices we continue to make blindly? The blinders are off now. We can transform our perception that we are separate and embrace the inner wisdom that tells us we truly are One.

Mom ❤️🙏

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